The Unswung Bat

Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Screw Grant

Holy Hell, someone done hitted ma' blog with uh ugly-stick. For a whole day and a half, my page layout was catastrophically tampered with. The carblog was smeared all over the left margin like a messy traffic accident, floating DIVs and IMGs, rather than pulling their weight, rested complacently on their own private blocks of space. And those unsightly and embarrassing purple Visited links came back. Plus, all my pictures were gone! But I know what happened, and who's to blame.

The webspace that U of T supplies me, and where most of my pictures and layout files are, went down. And why was that? Because of Hugh Grant, that's why. How do I know this? There's a theory behind that, that's been circulating among the scientists for years now, not really so much a "theory" as a fundamental paradigm overarching this whole "internet" phenomenon. The inviolable rule is this:

Whenever something bad happens inside the internets, Hugh Grant did it.

Remember this principle. Its simple appearance conceals a staggering level of complexity that has the foremost researchers of Hugh-Grant-is-a-jackass grappling with deep and far-reaching implications.

And as for me, I'm putting the Armadillo of Shame on lookout duty until I'm absolutely sure that smirking, meddlesome limey is out of commission. Fuckin' Hugh Grant.

Oh, and sign my guestbook and read this post, even though I call you lazy in it (I say it with love). In exchange, you will live forever (in guestbook-signature form).

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