The Unswung Bat

Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Why are Jews Different from Chocolate?

This question was of high importance last production night at the newspaper. Specifically, why do we hyphenate Jew-lovers and Jew-haters, but not chocolate lovers?

I would've loved there to be no good answer, 'cause the editor-in-chief struck my hyphen from chocolate lovers and then had the balls, or ovaries, to put back hyphens I'd removed from Jew haters/lovers. But I also can't resist solving a puzzle, so it was me who came up with the reason I was wrong. One would not, in context, imagine chocolate lovers to be an amorous couple who are made of chocolate. Jews, however, can themselves be both lovers and haters. There it is.

Go home and write it down.

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